Saturday, September 27, 2008

"Fuck this, I'm going".

Well, first up, life updates. 2/5 on holiday goals (urinal wank, Clockwork Orange). I've been listening to Pro Team non-stop, I only wish I got into them earlier so I could've seen them live. New Fall of Troy is shaping up to be amazing, Thomas Erak is leaning towards more of a melodic singing-style which really suits his voice. Bought the jacket, looks top as.

But, all is not well. I recently went out to see Beverly Hills Chihuahua with a few friends entirely as a joke, assuming that it looked so awful it could only be good. How mistaken we turned out to be.
With five minutes of the movie beginning, we were already swearing at the screen, and Tim walked out around 20 minutes in. He came back, of course, but still, to push someone to that level so early on was astounding. I have never felt a desire to die more than when I saw this movie. The thing is, it was so bad, I recommend anyone to see it, just to see how horrible it truly is. I can't sum up the atrocity in mere words, although, we managed to create a list of things it was worse than (including Daddy Day Camp, The Nanny and any Australian drama).

Top movie, check it out.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

a change of scenery provides new-found confidence.

First of all, holidays have been amazing so far. Matt's place, city, hanging out with mates, it's been so good. Probably helping my state of mind, too. Picked up my first hard copy of a Godspeed You! Black Emperor album (listening through it right this second) and found a jacket I'm going to go back to the city and buy late this week/early next week, so if anyone wants in, I need people to go with.

But, I think the best part is that a 20 minute walk in the rain, listening to Reel Big Fish, has made me feel revitalized to the world. I have two weeks to enjoy myself, two weeks to get shit done, and I'm going to use those two weeks to the best of my ability, make them memorable, and not back down where I might have in the past.

And then, back to the pointless times of my life.

Monday, September 8, 2008

apathy and low-flying dreams.

It's funny. In this world of excessive greed and dreams that will go unfulfilled, someone who wants to merely get by with a dream job that is below the norm is seen as the strange one.

My dream job would be to work at a CD store, recommend people music they may enjoy, things like that. So, in this case, why am I even bothering at trying to perfect myself at unnecessary arts? Will a successful exam in VCE Literature better my chances at getting a job at Missing Link? Will suppliers only sell me CDs to stock depending on my Business Management SAC marks? No, and it's stupid to think otherwise.

I'm feeling entirely apathetic towards school work, and just school in general. Gone are the days when the idea of learning actually entertained my childish mind, because now I realize that we don't actually learn anything. We learn, I suppose, but it is in essence, nothing. Stem and leaf plots, management of change, analytical essays of newspaper articles. When will any one of us use these in a non-satirical context?

There's no point in setting high goals, the pessimist in me knows they won't come true, and the optimist has given up trying to convince me that it could happen, because let's face it, it's not like my track record for miracles has been high thus far.

Then again, the Hadron Collider gets turned on tomorrow, so even planning for this weekend might be conceited. Looks like there's hope for the optimist after all.

Friday, September 5, 2008

remember me as a time of day.

So, I'm sitting here, Explosions in the Sky yet again playing over pleasant, reminiscent thoughts, and if such a thing was possible, nostalgic hopes for the future. My life is finally starting to be where I want it. I have my friends, some of the best people I'll ever meet, I have my music, I like someone, and it just seems like everything couldn't be better for me right now.

However, just because I'm thinking of the good times, doesn't mean there weren't bad times. And I think now is as good of a time as any to address these. So, I'm going to do something I've never done before: I'm going to apologise for all the immaturity, all the things I regret doing in my past. To those I've hurt, to those I've caused any inconvenience for, I'm sorry.

I was a pretty shit person to those who never even deserved it. Those who I felt never gave me the chance, so I never gave them a chance. The "eye for an eye" mentality doesn't work in the real world, I realize that now.

If I wanted people to remember me as a time of day, I'd want a summer's sunset, as it's pretty much the best point of the year ever. I don't want to be remembered as an overly hot, spring's day where hayfever does little more than irritate one to the point of anger.

With that, I'm going to bed. Let's see how everything stands when I get back.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

ah, the downfall is almost worth it.

On a massive high at the moment. I got The Devil and God on, I'm chatting with some people, and I'm just in a really happy and talkative mood.

It almost feels as if it's the first time I'm watching a movie, when you don't know that the twist is coming. And, I can assure you, the twist will surely be coming.

Oh well. It's almost worth it for how I feel right now.